Which personal ad profiles get the best response?

In a Feb. 14th, 2010 article in the Los Angeles Times called Make it Personal, Keep it Real, experts gave advice about which personal ad profiles get the best response (aside from the obvious factors such as youth and above average attractiveness).
 
“If you start on a date with a picture from 10 years ago and you’ve gained 10 pounds or if you have a lot less hair now, you’re starting on false assumptions. Then you get there and you’ve just proved to the person that they’ve just wasted their time. Your profile should be three paragraphs with, like, five sentences in each paragraph. It’s enough to know that you’ve spent time on it, and one of the paragraphs should be about you, one what you’re looking for and the third is what you’re into right now. It should be a conversation piece that someone could pick out if they’re going to write an e-mail to you. You’ve also got to spell check it like a resume.” – Whitney Casey, Match.com’s relationship expert and author of the book “The Man Plan.”

Simple, obvious, yet great advice since so many people don’t follow those recommendations!

I’d like to add that it’s good not to be too negative. If you are not attracted to older people, write “prefer within ___ years of my age” instead of “no grandpas!” Also, add a little humor, either your own, or a quote from someone (and name the source).

“The more someone knows about you, the less they want to date you. If you write a massive essay, they’re going to find something to dislike about that person. If you don’t know something, everyone assumes you’re the same as them. Let everything else come out during the dates.”  – Markus Frind, founder/CEO of PlentyofFish.com.

This is true. Since so many are looking for the “perfect” partner, anything that varies too much from their fantasy may turn them off, even if, amazingly, some don’t fit their own requirements!
 
Try to see your words from the perspective of others. If you list that you like hypnosis, for example, those who have never experienced it may incorrectly assume you will manipulate them. Or, if you mention that you spend much of your free time horse back riding, they may not realize that you’d make time for them, especially if they don’t like horseback riding. 
 
Though you shouldn’t write a massive essay (few will read it all anyway), it’s important to be upfront so you don’t lead someone on or waste their time time. You really should mention in your profile or in the initial phone contact the important details that someone may want to know before deciding to date you.
 
For example, some people may not want to date someone who has kids at home, is 5 or 10 years older than their profile age, has a life threatening illness, is unemployed and unable to work and has massive debt and lives at home and has no car, doesn’t look nearly as fit as they do in their pictures, or was in jail for most of their 20s. It’s not fair to waste someone’s time and spring such things on them after they’ve spent time and possibly money getting to know you. Honesty is the best policy. Be up front and play up your strengths and advantages to compensate. You may get fewer responses, but it will make the dating process less complicated and less frustrating.

Here’s the full article of dating profile tips: http://www.latimes.com/features/image/la-ig-0214-profile-20100212,0,1242778.story 

Copyright (c) 2010 Stephen Petullo

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8 Responses to “Which personal ad profiles get the best response?”

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