“What’s your longest relationship?”

When ‘interviewing” a new romantic possibility, many singles will ask, “What’s your longest relationship?”

This question is often asked to see if the subject is capable of having a long-term relationship.

What the interviewer may not realize is that someone who has had long-term relationships, and especially those who have them back-to-back with no breaks in-between, may not be ready for a relationship.

As a matchmaker and intuitive consultant, I’ve found that those who are never single for long either have really good love timing (which is very, very rare), are afraid to be alone or can’t leave a relationship for various reasons, even when they want to. They can also have more emotional baggage than someone who’s been single more often.

By the way, this is why I no longer congratulate people who brag about how long their relationship has lasted, though some have earned it and some do have good long-term relationships.

Someone who is very uncomfortable being single looks for a relationship to remedy their “unhappy” situation, and often settles for and stays with someone who is not compatible. To them, even bad relationships or relationships that are clearly over are better than no relationship.

If you want a better love life, the first step is to learn to be happy and feel complete on your own. 

Here are a few related columns we wrote:
Afraid to be Alone: http://www.holisticmakeover.com/March28th2008.htm
Afriad to be Alone Part II: http://www.holisticmakeover.com/April11th2008.htm
Top 17 Joys of Being Single: http://www.holisticmakeover.com/May9th2008.htm

Copyright (c) 2010 Stephen Petullo

What’s the longest you’ve stayed in a relationship after you knew it was over?

Have you ever missed a compatible possibility because you stayed in a relationship you should have left? If so, do you regret not leaving?

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2 Responses to ““What’s your longest relationship?””

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